There is an amusing anime series called Ranma 1/2, based on the manga of the same name.  The basis of the story is the title character, Ranma Saotome changes from a boy to a girl when hit with cold water and back to a boy when hit with hot.  The girl transformation doesn’t require the water be particularly cold; a good rain does the trick.

 

Ranma gained this odd affliction by training in martial arts at a fictional place in China called Jusenkyo.  Jusenkyo’s claim to fame is a number of small pools of water which have all had somebody or something drown in them.  Anybody who falls into one of these pools takes on an affliction similar to Ranma’s, based on which pool they fall in.  Among Ranma’s friends is his father (Genma) who turns into a Panda, Ryoga, who turns into a small black pig, Mousse, who turns into a duck, and Shampoo, who turns into a cat.

 

The series is amusing and I like it a lot.  I can suspend my disbelief for the supernatural things which happen; many are standard anime fare.  In addition to the shape-shifting, the characters can make super-human leaps, like jumping from rooftop to rooftop, perform feats of super-human strength (other than jumping), make weapons appear out of thin air, etc.  Ryoga, for example, loses his clothes and belongings when he turns into a small pig as he has no practical way to carry his things around in that form.

 

Setting aside disbelief for such things, there are some reality checks that bounce on the show.  Part of the premise is that Ranma and his father move in with the Tendo family.  Genma’s lifelong friend, Soun, is the head of that household and they decided many years before that their children would marry so their dojo could stay in the family.  When the Saotomes move in, it is decided Ranma will marry Akane Tendo.

 

Ranma and Akane are combative from the outset and don’t care for the arranged marriage.  However, they are both sixteen, and they soon warm to each other.  They refuse to admit this.  Ever.  Throughout the series, they remain antagonistic towards each other, but at the same time they have jealous fits at the drop of a hat.

 

Let’s look at this in a different light.  Ranma and Akane are, as I said, sixteen.  Their fathers on several occasions encourage them to be affectionate with one another.  In an early episide, Akane’s dad goes so far as to give them permission to sleep together.  This, for most modern teens, is a dream situation.  But Ranma and Akane balk at it, refusing to show affection except on the rarest of occasions.

 

The problem, really, is Ranma.  He shows no sign of being gay, but he turns away the affections of several women.  There are three girls–Shampoo, Kodachi and Ukyo–who pursue him from their introduction to the series.  Ranma rejects them all.  It could be argued this is out of some sort of loyalty to Akane in spite of his protestations to the contrary.  His actions sometimes suggest this.

 

This mystifies me.  Why does Ranma show no interest in any of these girls or any of the others who show up throughout the series?  He seems to like girls, but absolutely refuses to act on any feelings he might have.  He’s not particularly shy in his male or female form.  Of course, romantic relationships are often awkward or difficult for even the most extroverted of people.  Ranma may just be an extreme example of this.

 

Even allowing for this, I think the Ranma character takes the romance avoidance to an unrealistic extreme.  If I were to rewrite the story, Ranma and Akane would eventually become a couple.  Akane would figure out Ryoga is the little black piglet she adopts as a pet, be mad at him for not being truthful about this, but then forgive him.

 

(This is another point of contention for me.  Akane is bright enough to figure out P-chan [her name for Ryoga’s pig form] is Ryoga.  Even if she did not, somebody should have pointed it out to her at some point.  Her own father witnessed Ryoga’s transformation from pig to boy twice in one episode, but never said questioned the pig sleeping with his daughter.  Sure, it was a running joke of the series akin to nobody figuring out Clark Kent is Superman, but it was still a bit overboard and baffling for me.)

 

I’d rewrite a few other relationships, too.  Mousse and Shampoo seem destined for one another in spite of Shampoo’s protests.  I think Ryoga could easily end up with Ukyo; they did acceptably well when they were paired in a three-legged race competition.  Wealthy Kuno would do well with Nabiki, Akane’s money hungry sister.  Kasumi seems destined for Dr. Tofu.  Kuno’s sister, Kodachi, seems destined for a madhouse or at least spinsterhood; she exhibits more madness than anyone else in the series (which is saying a lot).  Dirty old man Happosai would reunite with the lady love of his youth, Cologne, Shampoo’s great grandmother.  (This pairing could be dangerous for the world at large; both are martial artists of extremely high caliber as anime martial artists go.)

 

This relationship forecast brings another point about the unrealism of Ranma’s lack of romance:  Without exception, all of the other significant male characters in the series have a healthy interest in girls and express it in some way or another.  Mousse chases Shampoo throughout and Ryoga professes his love for Akane many times (albeit never to Akane herself).  Dr. Tofu goes nuts whenever Kasumi is around.  Kuno worships both Akane and Ranma’s female form without shame.  Ranma stands alone in this baffling aspect.

 

So if I were to rewrite Ranma 1/2–if I had the time and could avoid a copyright lawsuit–I would have Ranma and Akane warm to each other and then become a couple.  Ryoga would enter the picture early in this process, develop an affection for Akane.  Ranma would put up with keeping his piggy secret for a very short time; as his relationship with Akane progressed, he would become less tolerant of Akane’s attention to P-chan and vice versa.  Akane would learn Ryoga’s secret, there would be a falling out, but eventually she would forgive him and tolerate his presence.  (This is a comedy, after all; lighter attitudes are better.)

 

Shampoo would enter the picture and Kodachi.  Ranma would tell them he’s with Akane, period.  They would probably still pursue him, but Shampoo would eventually give up and hook up with the man who will worship her, Mousse.  Kodachi would continue to be insane but Akane would get violent about Kodachi’s affections towards Ranma until Kodachi backed off, assuming she ever did.  Ukyo would show up, make her play for Ranma, and then, being the practical girl she is, find a better target for her affections.  This might be Ryoga or her own version of Mousse, a strange fellow who only made rare appearances and seemed to have only a few less mental issues than Kodachi.

 

That’s a very brief summary; the series lasted for seven seasons.  (That may be an American breakdown; I do not know how it was broken up in its original Japanese broadcasts.)  There were other characters who flitted in and out of the series, but the above group were the major ones.  Maybe someday I’ll do a parody of the series to get around the copyright bit.  In the meantime, I’ll keep my eye out for cold water transformations…